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Allen Clarke Allen Clarke
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How I Became White

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There was a Time, not so long ago, that I wasn`t white.I had to be fast to survive.Isn`t that the way it always seems to turn out? At times, for some of my cousins, they weren`t fast enough.Can you guess who I am? If you guessed a Volkswagen Rabbit, you`d be wrong.I`m only human, after all, in a manner of speaking.Let me give you a few clues.I have been criticised for having big ears.Screw them! There`s a critic in every crowd, or so they say.My sense of hearing is just a little sharper than others, that`s all.Eh...Whut`s up, doc? Whatever compelled me to say that, just now? Excuse me, there`s a little fat bastard running behind me with a little pop-gun.I think he may be under the delusion that he`s some kind of hunter.
It`s a good thing I have my Nikes on today.Still haven`t guessed who I am? O.K.,Einstein, here`s another clue. What is this...Double Jeaporedy? The fact is, I love carrots.So what, I`m a devout wedgetarian.This might explain my sharp vision.Most people, in my world, go to sleep for the winter, in a manner of speaking. Still haven`t got it yet, huh?
Like I said I haven`t always been white.No, no, has nothing to do with race.In my world, let`s just say, I have a few enemies.I remember the time I metamorphed into what I am today.It was in the Fall.I was taking my usual jog, minding my own business, when a couple of the neighbourhood bullies came after me in hot pursuit.I was barely breaking a sweat and on the verge of my second wind when I saw it just dead ahead!It was an abandoned shack. How did I know it was abandoned?`s written right here in the synopsis of my story. I believe they call it artistic license!
So, anyway, I scurries in to the cabin just 2 seconds before something snaps behind me just barely missing my puff.I find myself,adjusting my sight in the dim confines of the porch.I somehow manage to pick the lock. I know, I know, it`s illegal. But you gots to do what you have to do.So once inside, I survey the interior of the cabin in search for food.I goes to the fridge lookin for a snack. I`m dismayed at only finding a carton of grossly- soured milk and a couple of cans of sardines. I`ve never been big on fish, besides, I can`t seem to locate a can-opener. I got your interest piqued, right? Still can`t guess who I am, right? I knew that I would probably stump you.
I HOP up onto the kitchen counter, rub my WHISKERS and look around.Finally, I grabs a bag in the dark and beef up on dog buscuits. Hmm..not bad, not bad, at all.Just as I`m HOPPING off the kitchen cabinet, I slips backwards, do a triple back flip and land on my feet directly into a big sack of flour!After the dust clears, I jump out of the sack only to look into the eyes of the handsomest guy I have ever seen. Don`t get me wrong, I`m as straight as they come.This guy is looking at me from a MIRROR!Oh, no, this must be a haunted cabin. This guy is pure white...white as a ghost!Then, I realize that it`s just me.
Outside, the flakes have been falling for most of the day.Looking through a crack in the cabin wall, I can see that there is a blanket of fresh-fallen snow all over the land.I`m no prairie chicken, so I casually sprint out of the cabin to join the rest of Nature.Still haven`t guessed who I am?One more clue, before I leave you. I taste real good in stew, with a little bit of carrot and onion. Anyway, this is the story of how I became white.

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