Please login or signup to add a comment to this paragraph.


Add comment   Close
Don Yarber Don Yarber
Recommendations: 42

Humor in the smallest degree


Share this writing


Link to this writing



Start Writing

More from Don Yarber

Being Too Descriptive
EVERYTHING I’VE ALWAYS WANTED IN A WOMAN
God loves idiots and little children.
Like an Old Barn
A Poets Fate

More Essays

Sam Lingham Sam Lingham
Recommendations: 2
Characters
Aaron Greene Aaron Greene
Recommendations: 8
Writing Blog 1: Beginnings
John Tucker John Tucker
Recommendations: 23
Establishing A Character's POV - (Point-Of-View)
Richard Z. kruspe Richard Z. kruspe
Recommendations: 16
First Day on my Own
Sam Lingham Sam Lingham
Recommendations: 2
Sonnets

This writing contains explicit content and is only for adults. You have been warned.

This humor is not for everyone.  If you are offended by explicit content, please leave now.


Well the surgery was a success but the patient died!

Seriously, it went OK.  The anesthesiologist told me he was going to stick a tube down my throat after I went to sleep to assist me in my breathing.  I told him I could breath all right without it, but they did it anyway, now I've got a sore dick and a sore throat!

All was well.  I got dressed and was ready to go home.  Then I went to pee.  Several big drops of blood dripped into the toilet bowl and I called the nurse who called the doc.  They put me back in my room, made me take all of my clothes off again, shoes, socks, underwear, everything.  Then the doc came in and said, "I'm going to have to put in a couple more stitches."

By now the anesthetic had worn off.  

He said, "This is going to hurt a little"

The nurse said, "Just a little prick"

I said,  "I BEG YOUR PARDON !!!!"

Afterwards the Doc said, "I bet you haven't showed it to so many women at the same time before."
There were 3 nurses and Shirley and the Doc in the room.  I said, "I'm going to start charging admission.  I'll be the centerfold in Chippendale's magazine".  He said, "I'd have to pay THEM to look at mine."  I laughed so hard I had to pee again.  

They wouldn't let me go home until I peed.  I tried and tried and nothing would come out.  Then I sweet talked a nurse into bringing me a cup of hot coffee and within five minutes I filled the urinal thingy.  I rang the bell and when she came back I said,  "I peed!!!"  She said, "Hallelujah!"

I said, "Amen, let's go home."

Oh well, it won't be long now.

The doc told me I needed to lose 5 pounds of ugly fat and I did!


Link to this writing

Share this writing


Don Yarber's website: http://donyarber.wix.com/kip-yardley

Next: nameless ones