Asma Ahsan Asma Ahsan
Recommendations: 31

to(o) unreal, to(o) good

Jordan Newman Jordan Newman
Recommendations: 15

thank you. some of these are written on various medium forms- so typo's and incorrect spelling along with grammatical errs' are bound to come up. i appreciate the assistance. before i release the second edition of my first book, i am going to ask the community at large if anyone would care to edit it- as well as the first edition of the next 2-4 volumes in the series (haven't decided if I want to do it as a 3 set vol. or 5) either way, i will be asking for assistance on helping me with grammar and spelling as I know i have many errors... not because I can't spell or use grammar properly (however sometimes, those do tend to be the reason lol) it's just i want it to look as professionally done based on the sloppiness of the amateur whom is pretending to drive the car! - all kudos will be given out to those who help - as will some of the comments given to me throughout my stay here for both the book(s) and advertisement idea i have floating around inside my head. if anyone is curious or willing to volunteer to help- please don't hesitate to inbox me!

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Jordan Newman Jordan Newman
Recommendations: 15

for no fame nor any glory is what i do everything for.

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More from Jordan Newman

i see angels above me, i see demons below me, fighting over heaven.
i loved her more when i was sober.
i don't want a second chance.
love starts with that of a flickerin' cigarette
i swear i could feel your love before i knew your name.

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soul mates

Drowning in a sea of regret as i attempt

to tell her it's okay i understand.

Slowly i unstrap my plans from the pages

i detailed them in, our honeymoon erased

forever, never to see the light

of day again, just a funeral for my desire.

Got a hankering to stand alone

forever, facing the oncoming

storm, the grey clouds god sends

to me, every day, after sunshine.

Littered now in the fragments

of a memorable summer memory.

Started off slow, like suicide.

The first few months I spent

what felt like eternity

trying hard not to have cried.

Then, as I felt I couldn't

take it any more, this hell

was too old, too long,

to cliche, I arrived back 1 comment

to my home town, this city

where i assumed I could be

a new person, start over.

Spent a week or two

planning how it will go

for me, in this new

found intention of living.

Then, instantly, it didn't matter.

Sitting alone on a bench just after

midnight, on a damp-cool evening night

I seen her stroll up from the darkness

and suddenly all the cramps

in my stomach about what this life

is about vanished, as if she was peptobismol.

I stood up, like a bride was walking down the aisle

just to embrace her in a hug of compassion

that I tried to hide, not to give in, to inform

her instantly that I would do anything

for her, kill anyone, including angels.

Her touch is something I can never forget

despite how much I try, how much i try.

Late nights aren't filled with regret

any more, no they are not any longer

repeats of the days that came before.

to be by her side for even just an evening

was to much to bare, to imagine

yet, it past my biggest expectations.

The next day she called, and

said what a great time she had had

and my heart felt as if it burst.

It was clear, I was dead.

this was to unreal, to good 2 comments

to be true- yup, I knew it

I was a corpse, in heaven.

Where I get to see her angelic

smile every day, in repeat.

Then as I got used to the thought

it was ripped from my finger tips

like a dream vanishing in the early am.

Sweat stained my skin as I tried to figure

it out, figure out what I did wrong this time.

Informed it isn't my fault

but I can't help but melt

like I'm drowning in the water

that once encompassed my heart

in such a tight frigid iceberg grip.

So now I try hard not to latch onto the details that engulfed me under

a spell, like an acid flash back consuming

me into a history-driven life time of amusing

antidotes that will constantly remind

me of those few days we didn't say good bye.

Every time I hear certain songs,

I know they'll be ruined

to me, stricken up something

I can't ever put down on paper.

Feelings I can't grasp,

as I try to figure out if I should

call and tell you the truth-

how much I wish forever could'a stayed

like that night we stood

hand in hand, staring at a moon

swearing it'll be easier this time.

These lies, I fall for so often

they may as well be a drug

and me, I may as well be sixteen

for I can't find the strength in me

to start to resist, to even

say no, it's enough, I'll find in me

a power that will assist in this

decision to awake each day

although my arms are once again bare

of her soft, silk like skin.?

And I fear for the day when

I awake and she is gone

completely from my life

forever, like she got tired

of listening to my rants

on how i cant do it

without her, in my dreams.

In my head, my pride

swallowed beyond

anything i ever knew,

that day she picked me

out of the crowd

saying, ya you,

you will do, I like you.

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