Leonard a. Wronke Leonard a. Wronke
Recommendations: 23

same here...where is the rhyme.

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Paul Day Paul Day
Recommendations: 17

Harry Horrible and His Hilarous Hat-Venture


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I wrote this because of my frustrations at the number of really apalling books on Amazon who somehow manage to get lots of questionable reviews for what amounts to be garbage. The article that goes with this story can be found on my blog: http://myyanovels.blogspot.com.au/


One day Harry the Horrible,
(For that's what everyone called him),
Was sitting in front of his house,
When he suddenly had a horrible idea.


He would write a story.


Not just any story,
But a novel about...


HATS


That's right


HATS!


Not just any hats either.
They had to be hilarious hats.


Hats with propellers,
Hats with bright colors.
Hats made of feathers
and hats made of straw.


Big hats as big as a hat needs to be,
Little hats even too small for a...Bee.


"Now where to begin,"
Harry said to himself.
Then he saw an idea,
up high on a shelf.


It was monstrous and floppy
and disgusting and old.
It had been there so long,
It was covered in mold.


Harry reached up real high
and pulled down the big hat.
Then stuck it on his head
and well, that was then that.


He wore it all day,
as he did all his chores.
He wore it to town,
When he went to the stores.


He frightened the children,
When he went to the park.
His hat was so ugly,
It made everyone laugh. 1 comment


Now Harry was stupid,
Quite as thick as a brick.
So he laughed right along,
As he tried to do tricks.


The more tricks Harry did,
The more all the folks laughed,
As he danced and then spun,
Right there in the park. 1 comment


That night he sat down,
In his room at his desk.
Harry started to write,
the most magnificent story,
with magic
and mayhem
and intrigue
and quests.


He wrote all night long,
until the breaking of day.
Then he collected the pages
and boxed them away.


He went to the publishers,
with his proud little book.
But no interest they showed,
They did not even look.


Not put out by rejection,
Harry bought a machine.
An amazing device,
Harry had never seen.


It had a bright screen,
and it had a neat slot.
So he loaded his story,
The whole thing,
The whole lot.


Like magic his book,
On the screen came to life.
Looking better than ever,
He imagined it might.


His Hilarious Hat-Venture
Was now a real book.
Harry Marveled and wondered
At how horrible it looked.


But nobody noticed,
Harry's Hilarious story.
And he soon lost all hope,
That they'd share in his glory.


So he did something horrible,
In desperation you see.
He wrote his own comments,
Pretending others to be.


He made up personalities,
Writing glowing reviews.
It was all he could think of,
It was all he could do.


So many identities,
As the hats in his book.
Harry hoped no one noticed,
Harry hoped no one looked.


He waited and watched,
Checking every night.
For his book to be famous,
For his words to take flight.


But to his disgust,
To his utter dismay.
No one bought his new novel,
No one wanted to pay.


So he printed a thousand,
of the novels he bought.
And he went to the market,
So clever, he thought.


He stood up on a milk crate,
And read from his new book.
But of his horrible story,
No notice they took.


Some people did gather,
For a moment at least.
A mule and a farmer
And a Nun with her Priest.


So Harry went home,
Disappointed at length.
He'd not sold his story,
They had not made a cent.


Harry took off his hat
And put his stories away.
Then he sat in his bedroom,
At the end of the day.


He could not understand,
Why his story had failed.
So he sobbed and he cried,
And he sulked and he wailed.


Harry swore that he'd never,
Write his stories again.
Harry's Horrible Hat-venture,
Had now come to an end.


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Paul Day's website: http://www.bravebearbooks.com

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